Thank God that's over

February is my January

I don’t know how to start this other than by saying wow, it’s been seven months since I wrote on here and I’m embarrassed about it! I can’t even remember what happened in August but I was on tour in September and then I was the most depressed I’ve ever been from October through December and now we’re here. C’est la vie.

“Bug” came out on Valentine’s day, and I can’t thank you enough for listening and for all the kind words. My EP comes out on March 14th—it’s 6 songs this time, 3 of which you haven’t heard yet. Tickets for my headline tour (+VIP) are on sale now :)

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I historically hate January. December too, but with a short break for Christmas. I appreciate the fact that no matter how shitty your year was, the holidays force you to be at least a little sentimental. Everything fades away when you’re making a pavlova with your mom, shopping at your hometown mall (with free and plentiful parking) with your sister, tying red bows around brown parchment-wrapped presents, and watching Jude Law play the most charming love interest in the history of love interests in The Holiday. After that, all 31 days of January feel like a comedown.

For all four years of high school, the first week back after Christmas break launched us into tech week for my music program’s first show of the calendar year. Every year without fail, during that week or in the days following, everyone got sick (safe to blame the combination of temperamental weather + twelve hour school days + shared mics and general close contact during rehearsals).

One of the only pictures I could find from our January 2018 show - you’ll never guess what song I’m singing here.

There was one week my sophomore year where, in the span of a few days, we got a bomb threat, a man was struck and killed by a train at our local station one morning before school, and a beloved alum went missing and was found murdered shortly after. (Keep in mind this was January 2018, a month also famous for Logan Paul’s Aokigahara forest video and the tide pod challenge. Bizarre times to say the least.) Blaze Bernstein’s case was highly publicized and shook the school to its core; the murderer, one of Blaze’s classmates and a fellow OCSA student, was sentenced to life in prison this last November.

The insurrection at the capital happened six days into my first January after high school, and since then I think something in me gave up on viewing the first month of the year as a fresh, clean slate, full of possibilities. Last January I cut all my hair off, thinking maybe that would give it more meaning; this year I want it all back.

January 2024

February 2024

All this to say, I was in hibernation from October-January which is why I’m just now getting around to talking about what I loved in 2024 and will be bringing into 2025. Here is that list:

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• My library card

This one almost deserves its own post. Since getting my card in early November, I’ve read six books (halfway through my seventh). I’m well aware that according to some people’s barometers, that is not a lot! But as someone who was reading a book a week as a 7-10 year old and then got severely addicted to her phone and now is lucky to read one book every six months, two books a month is a huge upgrade and it feels very good.

My hack for actually getting myself to read during my free time is starting them right then and there in the library after I check out. I pick a spot downstairs, a couple shelves away from the group of men in their 80s reading the newspaper, and force myself to read at least a couple chapters so I’ll want to continue when I get home. This has become part of my routine in the same way that going to coffee shops or going thrifting used to, but I’m trying to cut back on both of those (caffeine in general and shopping in general) and sometimes it feels like it scratches the same itch.

• Topicals Lip Salve

I’ve been a chronic nail biting and skin picking girl my whole life and I’ve tried everything to stop (hypnotherapy, anti-bite clear nail polish, gel nails every 2 weeks, etc). This lip balm is so thick and sticky (in a good way) that after putting it on, I simply will not touch my mouth. I’m also a sucker for a mint scent. They came out with a tinted version recently that I haven’t tried yet, but I imagine it’s just as good if not better.

• Watching anime

OKAY LISTEN. I’ve been a Harry Potter and Star Wars fan my whole life (I did love Lord of the Rings when I watched it but was also dangerously close to falling asleep the whole time - need to try again). I’m a proud, constant re-watcher of old animated Disney movies. If you, like me, are open to the geek-y, the fandom-y, fantasy/sci-fi, and enjoy/appreciate animation as a medium, I promise there is an anime out there for you. If you don’t like fantasy/sci-fi but you do like animation, there are plenty of those out there as well. If you don’t like animation, that is your prerogative and I can’t help you there. I have been consistently so impressed and moved by the storytelling, character arcs, messages, and the animation itself, and shocked at how attached I get. I think so many people miss out because it’s seen as this intimidating, othered thing and it’s such a shame. TED Talk over.

(If anyone is genuinely interested in getting started and wants some recs, I will jump at the opportunity to gush even more.)

• Aquaphor stick

This has been a godsend while I’ve been working and while LA was the driest it had been in years. I like that you can pinpoint it in certain spots; I’ve been putting it on my knuckles and in between my thumb and index finger before bed.

• “Only buying refills” rule/keeping it simple

I’ve learned that the more minimal I keep my skincare and the more I listen to my actual real life dermatologist vs. people on TikTok, the happier my skin is. Also, as someone with oily skin, any moisturizer that’s been marketed as “oil-control” makes me break out and doesn’t make that big of a difference. I’m much better off using a regular but lightweight moisturizer, using less than I think I need around the T-zone, and carrying blotting sheets in my purse (I always see these in Larchmont Beauty Supply and think they’re so cute). Ditching moisturizer all together and just wearing sunscreen has also worked for me, especially in the summer (this won’t work with sunscreens that are more of a gel texture like the Supergoop Glowscreen, but it will with the Elta MD Clear). I’m also forcing myself to refrain from buying duplicates of products until I run out of the ones I’m currently using. No new lip liner until my Charlotte Tilbury runs out! No new lip gloss/lip tint/chapstick products until my Balm Dotcom, Topicals Salve, Aquaphor, Burt’s Bees chapstick, AND Clinique Black Honey all run out! Why do I have all of these!

• My polaroid camera

I got sick of bringing and then forgetting to use my digicam and film cameras on tour so I started toying with the idea of getting a proper polaroid. The idea of one photo at a time, immediately in your hands after taking it made way more sense to me than film (not the 10 year old Instax mini I inherited from my sister). I borrowed my dear friend Natalie’s for the Sarah Kinsley tour in September and fell in love with it. Logan got me my own for my birthday and it’s perfect; it’s blue and kinda looks like a whale. This is the most similar one I could find on Ebay.

• Zebra F-301 Stainless Steel Pens

I’m picky about pens; I prefer ones that are pretty thin and don’t leak out too much ink when you’re writing. In a pinch, my go-to’s are those Bic ones you have to use for standardized tests in school, but I’m always on the hunt for a new favorite. When I got an email from Zebra asking if they could send me a notebook and some pens, my answer was obviously an enthusiastic yes. Since then, this stainless steel pen has been my favorite. It makes me look forward to journaling! I just bought two more at Barnes & Noble. These are a close second and not just because cats are involved.

• Selling clothes on Depop

Depop recently got rid of all of their selling fees and made it a million times easier to ship. I used to be a Crossroads and Buffalo Exchange truther but eventually got sick of waiting in line only for them to take two items. With Depop you can actually make some money back and it takes only a little bit more effort.

There you have it. Until next time!